Thursday, 8 May 2008

The fraility of life

It's not uncommon to hear people say "Life is so fragile". And I absolutely agree with this statement.

I have seen and heard so many cases of lost lives, in rather abrupt situations. And, the recent cyclone that hit Myannmar, taking away over 20,000 deaths and still counting, shows how unexpected events could just happened. Of course, the proximity of such disasters may not impact our lives, but what about those that happen to our loved ones?

My grandmother entered Persistent Vegetative State today. It happened very abruptly and I last saw her on Saturday. On that day, I already noticed her body stiffness worsening on top of her loss in appetite. Even so, I had other activities I wanted to attend to, so I left her place early without much interaction with her.

I brought my observation up to my dad the next evening and we both agreed to take her to the hospital for a thorough check-up soon. I was secretly worried that she was gradually progressing to stroke. But I did nothing, but waited.

After that, I got busy. On Wednesday, I had to leave for Bangkok. At the airport, I called my loved ones, including my paternal grandma. Just before calling my darling, I thought of calling my maternal grandma. I contemplated. I didn't call. I decided that since she could hardly talk, it didn't matter. I would see her on Saturday.

But, I didn't get to see her, or talk to her. And now, I am not even sure if she could hear me. I was planning to bring my mom out for mothers' day lunch before visiting my grandma with her mothers' day tea. I didn't get to do it.

I wonder if she knows how much I love her or appreciate her. I so hope that she would watch me walk down the aisle with my DD. Yet, everytime I see her suffering from the pain of walking, it hurts me.

It occurs to me how we usually take people around us for granted, typically people who love you a lot. They are usually the family members. We always have this "there's still tomorrow" thought and sometimes, forget to appreciate them, or express our love to them. At times, we quarrel but we forget to love.

Ronan Keating's song, "If tomorrow never comes" suddenly made a lot of sense to me. I mean, it always makes sense, but I never ponder on the words so much.

I think it's very important to "kiss and make up" with loved ones. And, we should never wait for "tomorrow" to spend some quality time with them, or tell them we love them. Whenever we are able to, we should. Because life is really so fragile. Unexpected events could just take a life away.

I really do cherish and love my family. I hope they will always know my appreciate and love for them.